Welcome back, folks! I know you’re looking for funny hand puns to notch up your comedy skills, but finding them isn’t easy online, I know. But don’t worry because we have compiled the ultimate list of super hilarious hand puns for you.
The hands are one of the most important parts of our body, with their help of them we can do countless activities like gestures, hugs, picking up things, etc. Hands became crucial in gestures that go hand-in-hand to make memorable and humourous encounters.
Related – Corn Puns That Are Super A-maize-ing
Here in this blog, you will find not only the best hand puns but also shorthand puns, hand puns for kids, and one-hand puns. If you crack these puns among your friends, believe me, the boring situation will turn into a hilarious one.
Whether you’re looking for a good source of humor or want to break the ice, then the hand puns are perfect for you. So, sit back and relax and let these puns give you a much-needed break from the daily hectic schedule!
Funny Hand Puns
Here begins our amazing compilation of hand puns that will be going to make you go LOL!
#1. What hand’s favorite sport? Soccer, because it’s a foot sport!
#2. How do you make a hand feel better? You give it a tissue!
#3. What do you call a hand that’s been working hard? A hard worker!
#4. What do you call a hand that’s been punched? A boxing glove!
#5. What did the cop say to the hand? You’re coming with me. I’m placing you under a wrist.
#6. The man who invented the wristwatch probably had too much time on his hands.
#7. What did the police officer say to the hand? Stop! You are under a wrist.
#8. How do you make a handshake? You give it a fist bump!
#9. Why can’t your hand be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
#10. What do you call a hand that’s been in the water too long? A clam!
#11. I like to hold hands at the movies, which always seems to startle strangers.
#12. What happened to the handyman when he lost his hands? He became an army man.
#13. Why do fingers refuse to agree with thumbs? Because thumbs are opposable.
#14. What do you call a deer that can write with both hands? Bambi-dextrous.
#15. How did the gambler know his hand would stink? Because he was holding deuces.
#16. What has 2 hands, and a face and is only ever right twice a day? A clock with no battery.
#17. Said hello to a guy with really small hands, what a microwave.
#18. Which is the best hand to write with? Neither. One should always write with a pen.
#19. Why don’t hands like going to school? Because they’re always getting detention!
#20. What would you call a vocalist singing with a hand shower? A Faucetto.
#21. What would the world be like without left-handed people? Eh, it would be all right.
#22. What sort of gossip does one clock tell another clock? Second-hand information.
#23. If one ever cuts out their left hand, their right hand will be left.
#24. Why did the cow jump over the moon? Because the farmer had cold hands.
#25. That’s a bit of a heavy-handed approach, don’t you think?
#26. Why did the hand and the mitten get married? Because it was glove at first sight.
#27. Why can everyone clap with their hands except T-rex? Because they are extinct.
#28. What do you do when life hands you melons? Acknowledge you may have dyslexia.
#29. What did the CSI team find in the clean nose? Fingerprints.
#30. What do you call a hand that’s been caught stealing? A thief!
#31. What happens when you put your hand in a blender? You get a handshake.
#32. I cut my hand opening a bottle of sparkling wine, I guess every rose has its thorn.
#33. I punched my monitor and now my hand really hertz.
#34. My nails are getting too long and they’re growing out of hand.
#35. My hands are so sweaty, I feel like I’m going to have to wash them again.
#36. How does anyone wash their hands on Christmas? With a hand Santatizer.
#37. I’m not saying my hands are clean, but I can at least wash them.
#38. What is something you can hold in your left hand but not in your right?
Your right hand.
#39. I’m not saying my hands are perfect, but they’re definitely above average.
#40. My hands are so cold, I feel like I’m going to have to warm them up.
Related – 127 Funny Bean Puns
Short Hand Puns
Here are some of the best short hand puns that you should not miss!
#1. What’s a hand’s favorite game? Rock, paper, scissors!
#2. I’m glad I know sign language, it’s really handy.
#3. What’s a hand’s favorite fruit? A banana!
#4. Where do pirates get their hooks? Second-hand stores.
#5. What tree fits in your hand? A palm tree.
#6. Why is the traffic cop the strongest man in the world? Because he can stop a 12 Tonne truck with his hand.
#7. My hands are tired from waving at people all day.
#8. I have 6 hands, 12 feet and 3 heads. What am I? A liar.
#9. People should really hand it to short people! They can’t reach on their own.
#10. What did the digital clock say to his grandfather clock? Look Grandpa, no Hands!
#11. 6:30 should be the best time of the day, hands down.
#12. What has a tail and a head but no hands? A coin.
#13. What do you call a hand that has a cold? A sick hand!
#14. I can’t put my finger on it, but something seems off.
#15. Which nails do carpenters hate hitting? Fingernails.
#16. You know what has 8 hands 8 legs and 8 eyes? 8 Pirates
#17. A guy I know has got a prosthetic arm. It is quite handy.
#18. I think a palm tree is just a tree made out of hands.
#19. How many bones does a hand have? A handful maybe.
#20. Let’s put our hands together and make some magic happen!
#21. Why is dry beef’s handwriting very bad? Because it’s very jerky.
#22. How does the Pope dry his hands? He uses a Papal towel.
#23. I auditioned for a carpenter’s hand and nailed it.
#24. What did the robber say to the clock? Hands up.
#25. I’m feeling a little handsy today.
#26. How can you make a hand happy? You hug it!
#27. What’s a hand’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal!
#28. Don’t worry, I have a hand-le on this situation.
#29. Let’s give them a round of applause, hands down.
#30. I had a really good hand joke but I just couldn’t put my finger on it.
#31. Why couldn’t the clock work alone? It needed a hand.
#32. I once got myself a slippery soap. It got out of my hands pretty quickly.
#33. Hand sanitizer is like a mini-vacuum for your hands.
#34. What has five fingers but isn’t your hand? My hand.
#35. This job requires a lot of hands-on experience.
Related – Frog Puns About Love
Hand Puns For Kids
It’s time to have a glance at some of the best hand puns for kids that will put a smile on their faces.
#1. Let’s get a hand on that problem and solve it together.
#2. Hey bro, can you hand me that pamphlet? Brochure.
#3. I have 7 apples in one hand and 9 bananas in the other, what do I have?
Really big hands.
#4. Give me five! High five!
#5. If I have a bee in my hand, what do I have in my eye?
Beauty. Since beauty is in the eyes of the bee-holder.
#6. Never argue with left-handed people, they’re not right.
#7. Buddy, you nailed it with the performance.
#8. Let’s put our hands together for a job well done!
#9. The Paralympics champion single-handedly won the match.
#10. I don’t like it when my friend has hand sanitizer and I don’t. He’s always rubbing it in.
#11. I’m so glad we’re friends, we make a great hand-in-hand team.
#12. Your hands are like superheroes, always ready to save the day.
#13. A friend of mine met with a bike accident and broke his left hand, he’s all right now.
#14. I came across a lion in the jungle, I didn’t run and decided to face him with my bear hands.
#15. You are my right hand!
One Hand Puns
It was difficult for us to compile the ultimate list of one hand puns but we did it. Have a look at them!
#1. What are the best names for your right-hand watchdogs? Rolex or Timex.
#2. Broke my finger today. On the other hand, I’m okay.
#3. What do you call a one-handed ninja? A “wun-handa”!
#4. Why was T-Rex only selling hand guns? Because he was a small arms dealer.
#5. You nailed it with that one hand!
#6. What do you call someone with one arm? Hand Solo.
#7. If you have 4 apples in one hand and 3 oranges in the other. You should probably go back and get a basket.
#8. How did the one-handed man become a magician? He learned to make his hand disappear!
#9. Why did the man with only one hand cross the road? To reach the secondhand shop.
#10. My friend has a butler who only has one arm. Serves him right.
#11. What did the left hand say to the right hand? “Hey, you’re alright?”
#12. How does an amputee play with themselves? Singlehandedly.
#13. Don’t bite the hand that feeds you.
#14. What is better than winning a Gold medal at the Paralympics? Having both hands.
#15. What did the one-handed lawyer say to his client? “We have a strong case, hand down!”
#16. I’m a bit of a handful, but you still love me, right?
#17. Have you heard the one about your arm bone? It’s very Humerus.
#18. What did the one-handed drummer call his band? The One-Handed Band.
Hand-up, I mean heads-up you have made it to the end. There’s nothing quite like these good hand puns to put make people laugh. These puns can be a great way to add a touch of humor to any conversation or situation.
So what do you think about these best puns about hands? We sincerely hope you enjoyed reading these hilarious puns to the bottom.
If you liked the blog, don’t forget to share it with your buddies. Till then, see you!
Also, Read – Funny Cat Puns